Go

Its one of those moments when you just sit back and look at the magnamity of the calamity that you are a part of. That you are solely responsible for. That is, in fact, you. I have done some pretty stupid things in the past, but this has to take the cake. I am in a place i have absolutely no interest in, i am trying to learn things i do not understand (yes i do understand thats the sole purpose of learning it, but sigh, if thats the question in your mind its obvious u don’t get me) Just leave, why don’t you? Just go away and leave me to ponder upon my goals and communication skills and be a deer caught in the headlight. Only except that this deer is in a tunnel and the headlights are those of an approaching train. Ah, how easy it is to draw analogies when you are in deep shit. Is deep shit an analogy too?
Have you seen Clockwork Orange? I did my first ever presentation on that. Its ironic because thats exactly how i feel. Trapped. Forced to listen to jargon. Like somebody has clamped m eyes and ears open and tied me to a chair. I hate this place much much much more than you can ever imagine. And not just because it sucks, even though thats a major reason. Because i understand as days move by, that this is something i’m just not meant to do. To quote a friend, “this isn’t me”. And so it isn’t. Not even a little. Not even a microscopic bacteria. And to think i chose to come here on my own volition. Without being dragged in kicking and screaming, that is.
2 years of my life. 2 WHOLE years. It amazes me with what fluidity i can see my youth slipping away in front of me. It would amaze you too. Let go of the brand equity. Just let go. Go. Leave. Scram. Out.